Some prostitutes get shot outside a hospital and come inside to get medical care. The hospital is a whore helper.
School – kura
A courier rider rides through town, and eventually rides into a school to drop off a package. He’s the school courier.
Church – whare karakia
A ferry sails past with a church on top of it. Suddenly there is a big crack that splits the ferry in half, right up through the centre of the church all the way to the spire. The church is a ferry crack.
Airport – papa rererangi
A family is sitting at an airport. A young man gets off his phone and says to his father “Papa, Rory rang”.
Library – whare pukapuka
A ferry sails past with a library on top of it. Inside the library, two cars full of cow manure drive through looking for books. The library is a ferry poo car poo car.
Town Hall – hōro
Outside of a town hall, a number of prostitutes stand in a line. The town hall is now a whore row.
The Māori word for ‘school’ – kura – shares ‘k’, ‘u’, ‘r’ sounds at the beginning with the English word ‘courier’
Railway Station – teihana rerewē
Outside of a railway station, a man sits balancing a pile of tea bags in one hand and a tea kettle in another. The railway station is a teahand railway.
Fire Station – whare tinei ahi
A ferry sails past with a fire station on top of it. Two firemen have one eye normal and one eye made of tin. The fire station is a top a ferry tinny eye.
Port – tumu herenga waka
On top of a cargo ship, two cows are listening to a noise below. Down below at the port, a man is using a weed whacker to keep some vegetation at bay. At the port is two moos hearing a whacker.
Post Office – poutāpeta
The Post Office is flooded, but a petal falls off a giant flower and lands on the water like a boat. The postman uses it to paddle out of the Post Office. He is a boater petal.
Museum – whare tongarewa
On top of a ferry, there is a museum. An electrician wearing a Tongan rugby jersey enters the musuem and pulls out some wires to rewire then. The museum is undergoing a ferry tongan rewire.
Tower – pūwhara
Atop a stone tower, a man stands with his son. The man points to an object and asks “What’s that?” His son looks through some binoculars and says “It’s a poo, father.”
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The above is an excerpt from the upcoming Learn Maori Vocabulary With Mnemonics, by Jeff Ngatai, due to be published by VJM Publishing in the summer of 2018/19.
The ethnonationalism spectrum varies from ethnosupremacism (top) and ethnomasochism (bottom)
Despite being an accurate description of the way that human societies organised themselves for ten thousand years, the word ‘ethnostate’ has become taboo recently. Although the debate is usually dominated by arguments between insane Nazis and insane Marxists, there is a fascinating variety of opinions on the question of how wide and/or porous the group borders should be. This essay attempts to put them on a spectrum.
The two poles of the ethnonationalism spectrum are ethnosupremacism and ethnomasochism.
Ethnosupremacism found its apogee in the racial supremacist doctrines of Adolf Hitler’s Nazi Party in the 1940s, under which the Eastern Europeans were declared subhuman and therefore less worthy of existing in the lands of Poland and Ukraine than the German soldiers to who the land was promised. This pole of the spectrum fell out of favour, understandably, when the German “Drang nach Osten” ended up causing the deaths of over 25 million people.
There are two aspects to ethnosupremacism (see: The Three Definitions of Racism) and one is much more dangerous than the other. The first can be considered a sort of pride in the achievements of one’s kin and is little different to individual self-esteem raised to the group level, whereas the second is the belief that other ethnicities are categorically lesser and perhaps even ought to be exterminated.
The first step from ethnosupremacism towards sanity could be called ethnoconservatism. This is the “fuck you, I’ve got mine” of the ethnonationalist spectrum. This position is similar to regular conservatism on the class spectrum. Essentially it says that, because one’s own kind are doing well from the way that society is structured, there is nothing wrong with the way society is structured and it should therefore stay the same.
This is different to ethnosupremacism in the sense that the ethnosupremacist doesn’t believe that any amount of money can help the lesser races overcome their inherently base nature, whereas the ethnoconservative doesn’t care, they just don’t want to pay for it. Likewise, the ethnoconservative doesn’t despise other races, they just don’t think it’s right to mix with them, for whatever reasons.
This is a common position in the New World, on account of that the remnants of the native population are often much poorer than the descendants of the settlers. If an individual feels that the Government shouldn’t charge them taxes in order to fund social programs etc. intended to reduce income inequality, they are likely to take this position.
Ethnomasochism has found its apogee today, in the anti-white SJW culture that represents the furthest swing of the Great Pendulum away from the ethnosupremacism of the Nazis. Ethnomasochism is discussed at length here but could be summarised as a belief that one’s own kind were worthy of particular disgrace on account of some past political misdeeds. Very often, ethnomasochism is the result of a low self-esteem, whereby the individual’s self-hatred is projected onto the race as a defence mechanism.
The first step from ethnomasochism towards sanity is a realisation that individuals do not inherit sin from their forefathers, and that even if they did, it would be impossible to determine how much blame one’s forefathers had caused one to inherit. However, if one is more intelligent than the average person one might come to perceive that gross pride in one’s race is considered vulgar by most cultured people and that a modicum of racial humility ought to be adopted, on occasion, for the sake of politeness.
A white person here might not possess any self-hatred but might make a joke about how a high proportion of child sex offenders are white people. An Asian might make a joke about how he’s shit at driving, and a black person might make a joke about how he feels tempted to steal something. This is not genuine self-hatred but a kind of self-deprecation for the sake of social utility. Indeed, a person needs to have genuine self-esteem before they can joke about themselves in this manner.
This is the position most commonly associated with sanguine cosmopolitanism and could be described as ethnocurious. Many people who are university educated or who identify with the left-libertarian quadrant (of the common political model) are here, especially if they are the sort of person who does a lot of international travel. Ethnocurious people often have foreign girlfriends or boyfriends, and can prefer other races on account of that interactions with their own kind lack novelty.
In the middle of the spectrum is a point of reason. Here it is acknowledged that each person is an individual, and therefore neither responsible for the crimes of their race nor able to take credit for its accomplishments, and yet that each person has genetic characteristics that have shaped the way that their environment has treated them, and which have thereby shaped their life story.
Here one believes that the most logical thing to do, therefore, is to treat everyone else as equal partners in a grand human project to minimise the amount of suffering endured by conscious beings in this world. Other people are to be understood but their resentments are not to be encouraged.
Unfortunately for us, this point of reason conflicts with all the other positions. Ethnosupremacists will shun you for being a weakling who is unwilling to stand up for his own kind. Ethnoconservatives will shun you for being a suspected Marxist. The ethnocurious feel like this position wilfully misses out of much of the flavour that life has to offer, and ethnomasochists will despise you for not adopting their quasi-religious narrative that their particular race is guilty.
Even more unfortunately, this point of reason conflicts with neoliberal ideology (the prevailing ideology of our age), and so a combination of state and corporate power has colluded to obscure the truth about it. Neoliberal ideology demands that any desire on the part of big business for cheap labour can be met by simply opening the borders to mass Third World immigration, and so any problems that might be caused on account of mixing together people of genotypes that never previously mixed can be dismissed as racism.
The dumber a person is, the more likely they are to pick an unsophisticated position at either pole of the ethnonationalist spectrum. If they are sadistic they will choose ethnosupremacism where everyone else is subhuman, if they are masochistic they will choose ethnomasochism where everyone else is an immoral oppressor. If they are intelligent they will have a nuanced position somewhere centrist.
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