Beard – paihau
A man with a really long beard keep talking and talking, so a woman grabs it, stuffs it into his mouth and says “Shut your pie hole!”
Chin – kauae
A man with an enormous chin keeps tapping on a woman’s shoulder. She turns around and says “Go away!”
Ear – taringa
A woman is wearing massive hooped earrings, when a car drives past, throwing up a chunk of tar onto her. On her ears are tar rings.
Eye – karu
A car opens up its headlights and instead of lights there are eyes there.
Face – kanohi
A man in a canoe paddles down a river, but the canoe gets stuck on the giant stone face of a moai in the current.
Forehead – rae
A man is praying on his knees when a ray of light bursts through the clouds and strikes his forehead.
Hair – makawe
A man with incredible hair sits on a chair, as part of a contest. A woman walks up to him with a pen and clipboard and asks if she can mark his hair. “Mark away,” he replies.
Head – mātenga
At K-Mart, two disembodied heads get into an argument. The heads are exhibiting mart anger.
Lip – ngutu
A trendy-looking woman stretches out her lip and plays it like a banjo. To a nearby journalist, she says “It’s the thing to do!”
Mouth – māngai
An artist sits at a desk, practising how to draw mouths in the Japanese manga style.
Neck – kakī
A solider dressed in khaki has a neck that stretches high into the air.
Nose – ihu
A man walks up to a busker and, out of his nose, deposits a number of coins into the busker’s hat. Then he says “He who pays the piper calls the tune.”
*
The above is an excerpt from the upcoming Learn Maori Vocabulary With Mnemonics, by Jeff Ngatai, due to be published by VJM Publishing in the summer of 2017/18.