Te Reo With Mnemonics: Banking And Money Words

Money – pūtea

A mafia godfather is on the phone in his office. An underling comes up to him and says “I’ve got your money.” The mafia godfather points to the top of his desk and says “Put ‘er here.”

Money (II) – moni

A bank robber is making a get away in a car with a back seat full of cash. The cash in the back seat keeps complaining about being stolen money, so the robber says “Can you guys stop being so moany?”

Bank – pēke

A man is climbing a mountain range, and as he comes close to the top he discovers a bank hidden among the peaks. He found the bank once the mountains started getting peaky.

Cash – ukauka

A man walks into a brothel, and says to the madam “I want two women at the same time.” The madam motions to a room where two women are waiting and asks “Cash or card?” The man hands over a sheaf of twenty dollar notes. He pays cash for hooker hooker.

Account – kaute

A man walks up to a bank teller, who is in the process of putting on a heavy lambskin coat. The man says “I’d like to check my account.” The teller says “Sure, just let me get coated.”

Loan – pūtea taurewa

Two women are sitting beside each other on a tour bus. One of them says “I’m going to have to end the tour soon because I’m running out of money.” The other woman says “I got an enormous loan so I won’t have to end the tour ever.”

Savings/Investment – pūtea penapena

A tribe of pens elect one of their number, the greatest, as their leader. He is the pen of pens. The first thing he does is go into a bank and opens a savings account.

to save – whakaputu

A woman walks through a shopping mall with two demons on her shoulders telling her to buy this and buy that. They want her to buy everything. She says to them “Fuck up, you two, I’m trying to save.”

to spend – whakapau

A woman looks at a bank of computer equipment as a man explains his security camera arrangement. She says “You must must have spent a lot of money.” The man says “I spent money on professionals because I wanted to avoid a fuckup.”

Overdraft – tarepa

A man dressed as a fur trapper enters a bank. He is carrying some fur traps in one hand and some furs in the other. He puts the furs on the counter and says “I’d like to pay off my overdraft.”

Mortgage – mōkete

A man walks into a house with an armful of kettles. His wife is inside, and she asks him “Did we get the mortgage?” The man replies “Yes, so I thought I’d celebrate with more kettles.”

EFTPOS card – kāri utu ā-hiko

A woman is trying to buy something at a dairy. She is holding out her EFTPOS card and waiting. The girl behind the counter is trying to hiccup and this is preventing her from setting up the EFTPOS terminal. The EFTPOS card won’t get used until the girl behind the counter can carry out a hiccup.

*

This wordlist is an except from Learn Te Reo With Mnemonics, a book being compiled by Jeff Ngatai for an expected release at the beginning of 2020.

If you would like to support our work in other ways, please consider subscribing to our SubscribeStar fund.

The Gender Wage Gap Is Bullshit

Periodic outrage arises at something called the “Gender Wage Gap.” We are constantly being told that men are paid a certain percentage more than women because of anti-female discrimination and prejudice within the workplace. The problem is that the idea of a gender wage gap is absolute bullshit. Demographer Dan McGlashan, author of Understanding New Zealand, explains.

There is, indeed, a correlation of 0.23 between net median income and being male (and commensurately a correlation of -0.23 between net median income and being female). This is not a very strong correlation, and in this study is only on the borderline of statistical significance.

This does mean that men control slightly more of the nation’s money supply than women do. Some people, particularly on the left, make the assumption that all human population groups are precisely the same, and therefore any difference must be the consequence of oppression. The existence of a positive correlation between personal income and being male is taken as proof that women are systematically underpaid.

However, a closer look at the data reveals the lie in this lazy assumption.

The correlation between being male and having a personal income above $150,000 was 0.03 – essentially nonexistent. The correlation between being male and having a person income between $100,000 and $150,000 was even less than this, at 0.01. This shows that the distribution of the highest-earning jobs is almost perfectly even between men and women.

Indeed, we can see from Understanding New Zealand that there is essentially no difference between men and women when it comes to higher education. The correlation between being male and having a Bachelor’s degree is not significant, at -0.04, and for the postgraduate degrees the correlation is weaker still. So the equal share of educational achievement leads naturally onto an equal share of the top professional jobs.

The best-paid jobs in New Zealand are appointed on the basis of education and not gender. Further proof for this comes from the fact that the correlations between working as a professional and having any degree are extremely strong – around 0.80 to 0.90. The correlation between being a professional and being a male, by contrast, is not significant, at -0.10.

Nearer the centre of the earnings scale we can see that the correlation with being male rises, to 0.22, for an income between $50,000 and $60,000. This correlation is borderline significant, but it is in the wage brackets between $40,000 and $70,000 where the bulk of the nation’s income is earned. All of these wage brackets have a positive correlation of at least 0.18 with being male.

Lower down the earnings scale, we can see that the correlation with being male is negative for all income brackets below $30,000. It is a borderline significant -0.19 for the prime beneficiary’s income bracket of $10,000 to $15,000. Indeed, we can see that the correlation between being male and being on the unemployment benefit is -0.39, so women are significantly more likely to be bringing in less than average.

So if women and men are paid the same at the top levels, why do men earn more in the middle levels?

As mentioned above, the reason that men make more money than women overall is because of the fact that there are more of them in the $40,000 to $70,000 range and fewer in the $30,000 and below range. But the reason for this is not prejudice.

Most of this difference can be explained by the correlation of 0.48 between being male and being in full-time work. There is also a correlation of -0.48 between being male and being unemployed. Simply put, this means that men work a lot more than women do. Further proof comes from the negative correlations between being male and being on the unemployment benefit (-0.39), being on the invalid’s benefit (-0.26) or being on the student allowance (-0.21).

What this means is that the plum jobs are shared out equally between men and women, but the lower one goes down the socio-economic scale, the more likely it is that women will become unemployed instead. This makes perfect sense, because the less one earns the more marginal working becomes in comparison to spending that time on one’s family, and women are much more likely to make such a calculation than men.

The gap in earnings between men and women can be best explained, therefore, not by sexism or any other form of prejudice, but by life history patterns. Men tend to work hard as young adults and then work hard as older adults. Women, by contrast, tend to work hard as young adults and then transition to part-time work as they get older, shifting the primary focus of their concern from their career to their family.

What the statistics show is a very reasonable pattern of women starting out as professionals if they can, otherwise starting at the bottom and transitioning into family care as they age. Men also start out as professionals if they can and also otherwise start at the bottom, but the difference is that they tend to transition into managerial positions as they age. This is evidenced by the correlation of 0.49 between being male and working as a manager.

The “gender wage gap”, therefore, is best explained as the result of different choices made by the average man compared to the average woman. It has nothing to do with prejudice or sexism, and anyone claiming that it does is either misguided or lying.

*

Understanding New Zealand, by Dan McGlashan and published by VJM Publishing, is the comprehensive guide to the demographics and voting patterns of the New Zealand people. It is available on TradeMe (for Kiwis) and on Amazon (for international readers).

Te Reo With Mnemonics – Voting and Elections Words

to vote – pōti

A line of people enter a polling booth and cast their votes, then walk through into a room where a party is taking place. To vote is to party.

Election – pōtitanga

A man appears to win an election, and then walks up to a child’s potty and starts licking it. The election made the man the potty tounger.

General Election – pōtitanga whānui

At a General Election debate, representatives of various parties take turns to show their commitment by licking a child’s potty in the centre of the stage. A man in the audience finds this shameless display of lust for power hilarious, and cracks up laughing. This man finds the potty toungers funny.

Party – rōpū tōrangapū

A political party enters Parliament, all of them eating apples. One of them gets tangled up in a rope, and the rope tears the apple from his grasp. The political party was involved when the rope tore an apple.

Policy – kaupapa here

A bunch of politicians look nervously into a paddock. In the paddock there are a herd of cows, led by a very large, hairy, father. One of the politicians points at the herd and asks “What’s our policy for dealing with the cow papa hairy?”

Voting paper/ballot paper – pepa pōti

A man stands by a stovetop, cooking a pepperpot stew. Into the pot on the element the man adds some pepper, then a sheaf of voting papers, and stirs them around. The voting papers went into the pepper pot.

Electoral roll – pukapuka pōti

A collection of electoral rolls sit in a store room, with everyone’s name, occupation and address. The doors open, and a herd of pigs enter, set up some music, crack open some drinks and start playing poker. The electoral roll room got turned into a porker poker party.

Labour Party – Rōpū Reipa

A man dressed in red and wearing a Labour Party rosette stands on a stage with ropes around his shoulders. He breaks into a rap about the Labour Party. The Labour Party man is the rope rapper.

National Party – Rōpū Nāhinara

A woman dressed in blue and wearing a National Party rosette is trying to climb up into an attic. A man with nine ears – four on one side and five on the other – lowers a rope down to her and she climbs up it into the attic. The National Party woman got up thanks to the Rope of Nine-Ears.

Green Party – Rōpū Kākāriki

A woman dressed in green and wearing a Green Party rosette is an overseer on a cotton plantation. Instead of swinging a whip, she only has a rope, which hardly cracks at all. The Green Party woman is the rope cracker.

New Zealand First Party – Rōpū Aotearoa Tuatahi

In a troop transport plane, Winston Peters is standing next to a door along with a number of paratroopers, all dressed in black and wearing New Zealand First rosettes. The door is blocked by a rope. Peters pulls away the rope and shouts to the paratroopers “Out the door! Do or die!”

Maori Party – Tōrangapū Māori, Te

A giant turd, wearing a Maori Party shirt and wearing a Maori Party rosette, dictates orders to a set of terrified underlings. The Maori Party is the tyrant poo Maori.

*

This wordlist is an except from Learn Te Reo With Mnemonics, a book being compiled by Jeff Ngatai for an expected release at the beginning of 2020.

The Three Failed Political Models of Our Time

There are three very popular political models in the West at the moment, each one promising utopia through its own path, if only it is followed. The problem is that these three popular models have all failed catastrophically, and furthering any of them only brings more misery into the world. This essay explains these models, why they have failed and what we can do about it.

Elementalism holds that there is an ideal form of everything, and a practically infinite number of degraded forms all throughout the Great Fractal. The ideal form and the degraded forms exist along the Great Masculine Axis, which is itself divided into the masculine elements.

If we take a perspective that divides the Great Masculine Axis into four masculine elements, we can see one ideal political form and three major groups of degraded political forms. These three groups correspond to the three sub-golden elements of clay, iron and silver.

Clay refers to Communism or Democracy. These two terms can be equated because the masses will always tend towards desiring the redistribution of resources, and will always vote for people who promise this when given the opportunity. This is essentially the hyperfeminine model, or the slave morality model. According to this model, the collective – and the needs of the collective – are paramount.

Iron refers to Fascism or Ethnosupremacism. This is the political model that has failed because is it hypermasculine. Like a severely autistic child, the iron model seeks to put the rest of the world to order by force, and doesn’t care if the world consents. The resentment and resistance that this model provokes is usually its downfall.

Silver refers to the hedonistic consumer capitalism that the vast majority of VJM Publishing readers live in (whether they wish to or not). This model is neither hyperfeminine nor hypermasculine, but is characterised by being an insipid compromise between the two. Its fundamental problem is that it is not enough of either. Hence, people who follow this model are usually nihilists or hedonists of some sort.

All these models oppose each other, and so the world seems to be forever at war, pulled between three different poles depending on which primitive instinct holds the most sway at the time.

The clay model of Communism, true to the slave morality that motivates it, resents those who follow the iron model (who are dismissed as “racists” or “fascists”) and those who follow the silver model (who are dismissed as “greedy”). The basic motivation of those who follow this model is to rip down those who distinguish themselves either physically, mentally or socially.

This model could be described as extremist horizontalism. It fails by destroying itself, because once all the capable people are sufficiently hindered then the society becomes incapable of anything. If anyone making an effort is ripped down, people come to adapt by not making any effort for any reason. When they do this, society can no longer be maintained by the free will of its members.

The iron model of Supremacism opposes both the clay model and the silver model for being soft – the former for being natural weaklings (“subhumans”), the latter for being moral weaklings (“degenerates”). The iron model is not compromising, and people who follow it intend to kill their opponents rather than work with them. Failing that, it’s enough to intimidate them into submission.

This model could be described as extremist verticalism. In this sense, it’s naturally very similar to military rule, in which every participant knows their rank and therefore their place. As mentioned above, this model fails because of the massive resentment it provokes. It seems to be human nature to seek revenge for acts of cruelty, and the iron model eventually falls under the weight of its many enemies.

The silver model of neoliberal Capitalism is a very centrist mentality in all sorts of bad ways. This model considers the clay model and the iron model to be two poles of the same axis – the axis of brain-dead, brutal state authoritarianism. Neoliberal Capitalism, therefore, is the path of freedom. The silver position has a lot of merit – but their solutions are far from complete.

This model sees the followers of the clay model as dumb and weak, and the followers of the iron model as dumb and strong. The latter may be more dangerous as individuals and in small groups, but the former are capable of gathering by the multitude and enforcing their will through sheer numbers. It isn’t entirely wrong – followers of ethnosupremacist or collectivist ideologies tend to be dumb. For this reason, the silver model tends to destroy itself rather than get destroyed from the outside.

It was neoliberal Capitalism that arose first from the carnage of World War II, the iron model having exhausted itself, and the clay model having been crippled in the process. As a consequence, we are currently living under the silver model. It’s certainly much nicer than being in a deathcamp or gulag, but unfortunately for we who live in it, the silver model is currently hitting its limits in every sense.

The American opioid epidemic is currently killing 150 people every day, a body count that cannabis and the psychedelics put together haven’t managed in over a century. In New Zealand, the suicide rate gets higher every year, and this upwards progression shows no sign of stalling. A sense is spreading that we are living in the End of Times, as when the Western Roman Empire was falling.

These political models may all have great differences, but they also have one quality in common – they are all materialist. This is why they have all failed.

The three great political models of our age have all sought materialist solutions to the problem of human dissatisfaction, not realising that spiritual suffering is equally as important as material suffering. The clay and the iron fight each other while the silver looks on from a pile of cheeseburgers – but none are happy.

What’s missing is the gold model, one that takes into account the Will of God.

The gold model is not such a thing that can be easily described. Plato had a go, at length, in The Republic, and this essay cannot hope to come close. In short, however, it can be said that the gold model will incorporate knowledge that reflects the true, eternal and untarnishable nature of consciousness. It will return the political realm to its rightful place, under God.

Organising civil society around a ritual that reconnected people with God – something like a reborn Eleusinian Mysteries – would allow for people to suffer less in the spiritual realm. Absent this spiritual suffering, they will be less inclined to attempt to satiate themselves through control of the material world, which is the mentality that underpins all of the three failed political models.

*

If you enjoyed reading this essay, you can get a compilation of the Best VJMP Essays and Articles of 2018 from Amazon for Kindle or Amazon for CreateSpace (for international readers), or TradeMe (for Kiwis). A compilation of the Best VJMP Essays and Articles of 2017 is also available.